My Wife Does Not Understand Me
Posted: Mon Jan 29, 2007 7:34 pm
For me to feel intimate with my wife, I would like to feel that she is loving ME. My wife enjoys taking a make-wrong approach to me, and more enjoys arguing, and then making up later, as a Love Making pattern.
I would like a little less volatility and a little more feelings of Love.
Therefor, I need a strategy for having my wife to better understand me.
This could be simpler, if my wife were not a type of person who is easily influenced by the opinions of others. So even if I explain my philosophies and opinions to her this week, in three weeks, her mind will have been taken over by ideas and values from other individuals and groups that have expressed ideas to my wife during the intervening time.
I am thinking of keeping a list of questions handy, that will lead my wife to remember my ideas, beliefs and values, so that she can value my point of view. and prioritizing.
What are my ideas about:
1. Preventing burglaries of the home.
2. Keeping automobiles safe for passengers.
3. Concern about Global Warming.
4. Concern about poisoning the oceans.
5. Growing World scaricity of safe drinking water?
6. Direction of Interst Rates.
7. Direction of the US Economy.
8. My civic Duties.
9. My special strengths to contribute through some valunteer work.
10. Views on Differences between religions.
11. Views on differences between the World's warring factions.
12. Likelihood of losing our pensions?
13. Likelihood of losing our savings?
So I intend to have these questions more freshly in mind, so when my wife expresses ideas that contradict my beliefs or priorites, Instead of feeling disapointed, I can simply point out that she is stepping on my toes, and that I am asking her to recall my beliefs and ideas. Hopefull, during recall, my wife will find a means of expressing her newfound viewpoints, that will be less contradictory, less make wrong of her husband(Me).
I can simply ask the quesiton, ans ask her to think about the question. I may not have to really discuss the issue again. I intend to refuse to get drawn into a debate. I intend to try to limit my comments to the queestions, to which she can recall the answers.
Perhaps if my beliefs could use further explanation, I will find a quite time to go over my beliefs in a manner she can understand my ideas, should she be sufficiently free from the influence of others, to consider my values.
,.
I would like a little less volatility and a little more feelings of Love.
Therefor, I need a strategy for having my wife to better understand me.
This could be simpler, if my wife were not a type of person who is easily influenced by the opinions of others. So even if I explain my philosophies and opinions to her this week, in three weeks, her mind will have been taken over by ideas and values from other individuals and groups that have expressed ideas to my wife during the intervening time.
I am thinking of keeping a list of questions handy, that will lead my wife to remember my ideas, beliefs and values, so that she can value my point of view. and prioritizing.
What are my ideas about:
1. Preventing burglaries of the home.
2. Keeping automobiles safe for passengers.
3. Concern about Global Warming.
4. Concern about poisoning the oceans.
5. Growing World scaricity of safe drinking water?
6. Direction of Interst Rates.
7. Direction of the US Economy.
8. My civic Duties.
9. My special strengths to contribute through some valunteer work.
10. Views on Differences between religions.
11. Views on differences between the World's warring factions.
12. Likelihood of losing our pensions?
13. Likelihood of losing our savings?
So I intend to have these questions more freshly in mind, so when my wife expresses ideas that contradict my beliefs or priorites, Instead of feeling disapointed, I can simply point out that she is stepping on my toes, and that I am asking her to recall my beliefs and ideas. Hopefull, during recall, my wife will find a means of expressing her newfound viewpoints, that will be less contradictory, less make wrong of her husband(Me).
I can simply ask the quesiton, ans ask her to think about the question. I may not have to really discuss the issue again. I intend to refuse to get drawn into a debate. I intend to try to limit my comments to the queestions, to which she can recall the answers.
Perhaps if my beliefs could use further explanation, I will find a quite time to go over my beliefs in a manner she can understand my ideas, should she be sufficiently free from the influence of others, to consider my values.
,.