Posted: Thu Jan 11, 2007 7:47 pm
First year,
I had to laugh at your questions...do you know anyone that has used the techniques? Do you know any success stories?
You're speaking to one! Me.
I found the book helpful for knowing WHAT the techniques were and how to apply them.
I found the website helpful for support and just to read and find
comfort in the fact that "I'm not the only one going thru this"
The website also kept me focused on what I needed to be doing. As I read the posts, little reminders would pop into my head...things I had been forgetting/failing to do, etc. It kept me on the right track.
What I really like about myself now is that I have become the person in my marriage that I should have been years ago. That I could have been, but that I was too stubborn to be.
Part of that change, I owe to divorcebusting! But, I did the work, I made the changes, so I give myself a lot of credit!
A big step: own up to what YOU have done to lead your wife in the direction she is now heading. Don't do it for her. Don't do it for your marriage. Do it for yourself.
Case in point...I NEVER used to admit I was wrong when we fought. That damn stubborness. I also RARELY apologized. It was always my husband that would come to me to apologize/make up.
I find that both of those come easily now. With humility. With ease. With grace.
I had to first admit that it WAS a huge problem in our relationship and that ONLY I could change the course.
What can YOU do to change the course of your current situation? Don't worry about your wife. Worry about you.
Be the change you want to see in your marriage.
With only 4 months under your belt, and little history of resentment, fighting, etc. you almost can't fail.
You have nothing to lose. Check the book out from the library. Renew it a couple of times. Take notes. You don't even need to buy it!
I had to laugh at your questions...do you know anyone that has used the techniques? Do you know any success stories?
You're speaking to one! Me.
I found the book helpful for knowing WHAT the techniques were and how to apply them.
I found the website helpful for support and just to read and find
comfort in the fact that "I'm not the only one going thru this"
The website also kept me focused on what I needed to be doing. As I read the posts, little reminders would pop into my head...things I had been forgetting/failing to do, etc. It kept me on the right track.
What I really like about myself now is that I have become the person in my marriage that I should have been years ago. That I could have been, but that I was too stubborn to be.
Part of that change, I owe to divorcebusting! But, I did the work, I made the changes, so I give myself a lot of credit!
A big step: own up to what YOU have done to lead your wife in the direction she is now heading. Don't do it for her. Don't do it for your marriage. Do it for yourself.
Case in point...I NEVER used to admit I was wrong when we fought. That damn stubborness. I also RARELY apologized. It was always my husband that would come to me to apologize/make up.
I find that both of those come easily now. With humility. With ease. With grace.
I had to first admit that it WAS a huge problem in our relationship and that ONLY I could change the course.
What can YOU do to change the course of your current situation? Don't worry about your wife. Worry about you.
Be the change you want to see in your marriage.
With only 4 months under your belt, and little history of resentment, fighting, etc. you almost can't fail.
You have nothing to lose. Check the book out from the library. Renew it a couple of times. Take notes. You don't even need to buy it!