My marriage is 13 year old. My wife started her controlling behavior right from the day we got engaged - she wanted me to quit drinking. I promised her I would (which was a mistake - because I was setting a precedent without realizing it). After marriage she would occasionally throw tantrums forcing me to comply to her ridiculous demands (otherwise face consequences like she would go away, she would call my friends and embarrass me(She would make note all phone numbers from my phone address book), visit me at my office and create a scene there etc.) but I was giving in to her demands (which again was a mistake again, I admit). These are her wishes:
1. I'm not supposed to have lasting friendships or working relationships
2. I'm not supposed to be friendly with any woman (not even her sister or my sister, early in marriage she wanted me to forever forget my parents as well)
3. I'm not supposed to drink or have certain types of food (i don't have a drinking problem or am otherwise unhealthy)
4. I'm not supposed to have any woman friends on facebook - whereas she has her old male friends from her school days
We have twin daughters who are 11 year old now. If I fail to satisfy her demands, she will take my kids away - this is a viable threat or so she realized. I can't possibly let her take my daughters away, so I continue to give in to her. She has trampled on my dignity several times as she started involving my daughters into her modus operandi - they are urging me to do as their mother says to avoid unpleasant fights at home - exactly what my wife wants. Kids feel insecure about my relationship with their mother because they loose their sense of security and they loose me (or so they fear) for they love me.
What do I do?