Hi,
My wife and I have been married for 11 years. What follows is a problem we have had since just about the beginning...
Call it a fear of intimacy or low sex drive, but I have trouble initiating sex. My wife refuses to start anything anymore because she feels if she makes any type of overtones and I don't pick up on them, I am turning her down because I don't find her attractive.
Consequently, I am more confused now. She doesn't want what she calls pity sex so I am more afraid to initiate thinking she'll just think I'm doing it because I have to (that is not the case!)
Understand we both have huge personal problems; I with self confidence and she with self confidence and unrealistic picture of herself. she is a little on the heavy side, but that is not what causes me to have problems initiating.
My question: how can i make it clear to her that this is my problem? I've pleaded with her and explained my feelings over and over. She just won't accept my explaination and our marrige is in a critical state because of this.
please help! I don't want this marrige to fail, I love my wife with all my heart.
Thanks