Husband's affair with Ex Wife

Husband's affair with Ex Wife

Postby Nameless » Wed Feb 12, 2014 4:20 pm

My husband had an affair with his ex wife while we were dating and married but didn't tell me about it until it he was cornered by the situation (depostions from a custody battle with his ex). They have a child together who lives with us full time. We started dating when his son was an infant. After being married for a year and with orders for him to deploy his ex wife decided to fight for full custody. He claims he wants nothing ot do with her in that way and he is remorsful and wishes it never happened.

The problem is his ex wife is in our lives everyday due to communication with their son and the custody battle. I've been to therapy and couples therapy but it's now been 2 years since he told me about it and I still hold anger and fear that this will happen again. He has told me that it won't but how can I trust that.

I want nothing more then to make our marriage last and he says that same. He has expressed he was sorry and realizes how much pain it has caused but how do I get over it and trust him when the person he had an affair with is someone that I have to face on a daily basis?
Nameless
 
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Re: Husband's affair with Ex Wife

Postby ThunderHorse » Sun Feb 23, 2014 3:20 pm

To Nameless:

It seems the emotions would be difficult to handle, so the first question could be how can things be arranged so that you have less contact with his ex-wife?

Is there some way to start working toward having less contact with his ex-wife?

There are probably some images coming to mind, in which you could feel embarrassed, if your husband slips.

Maybe you could count your blessings. Maybe you could ask for more control of finances, so that you could feel you are playing from a superior hand. Maybe a trust fund, that is set up to give you power in the event of divorce or infidelity. Maybe talk to a Domestic Relations lawyer to see how to arrange family finances now, so that you don't feel disappointed, or fearful.




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ThunderHorse
 
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