There are books on how to trap cheaters and liars. Basically, you ask them pointed questions, like, "When do you plan to see Kate for lunch again?"
You can ask your husband for a no contact letter.
You can say you feel uncomfortable with his empotional affair with Kate. and ask him to cut back his contacts with her.
You don't need to snoop, you can just ask pointed questions, which if he gives evasive answers, you can repeat your request that he cut back his contact with her.
You do not mention building up your husband's ego.
"How can I be more fulfilling of your needs and desires, so you will less often think of texting/calling Kate?
What are the stresses in his work? What kind of a car would he prefer to drive? What sports teams does he root for? Why is $121 Million per team salary cap not enough for the NFL Players? How can you make your husband comforable inviting some of his male friends over? What are your husband's ideas about parenting? What does your husband intend to do differently from his parents? How are you supporting his parents wishes for your child?
Chairs, Need/Desires of men from women
Here are some “Chairs” search results form the Secrets Forum
Post near the end of the thread, wife not experiencing passion in marital relations
http://www.secretsofmarriedmen.com/phpB ... ght=chairs
Post 2 and further on, Wife feels she is doing everything right in the marriage, and household, but husband does not like to engage in conversation, and does not really like to be at home.
http://www.secretsofmarriedmen.com/phpB ... ght=chairs
Last Post Page 1, Wife asks how to get more from her marriage, and what is important to husbands in marriage. Has COUPLE words outlined.
http://www.secretsofmarriedmen.com/phpB ... ght=chairs
3rd post. Attractive wife with 3 children complains that her husband has lost interest in marital relations. Couple Word headings
http://www.secretsofmarriedmen.com/phpB ... ght=chairs
THE SECRETS OF HAPPILY MARRIED WOMEN, HOW TO GET MORE OUT OF YOUR RELATIONSIP BY DOING LESS, 2008, BY Haltzman and DiGeronimo
Table of Contents:
1. Know Your Husband
2. Nurture His Needs - and Yours
3. Fight Better
4. Talk Less
5. Have Lots of Sex
6. Take Charge of Your Own Happiness
7. Heal Thyself
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