Whats wrong

[bill.chaney98]

My wife and i married in aug 2010 and i soon left for iraq for a year, we decided to have a baby and she got pregnant on midtour leave. I came home in aug 2011 and we had baby in november. Things were great, we never fought and got along. We hadnt had sex since my midtour leave, I came home with her 6 month pregnant, so i wasnt mad i understood. But all intimacy stopped just a kiss when i left for work. 2 months after baby i came home and she was gone, she left a note and went to her parents 3 hours away and its been 2 months. She says she doesnt love me and hates me. I get to drive up there on saturday to see my son for a night a week. This is killing me. she said my drinking was the issue but never said anything. I havent drank since she left and i offered counseling and everything to help us get through this. She says no no no. She wont get help, shes left the state for 2 weeks visiting friends and doesnt care what i think. I love her more then anything and im praying and got counseling myself. But shes walking all over me. should i finally just tell her to file for divorce, Im going to tell her im fighting for our son and want joint custody, I think if she hears this she may realize that this is stupid and we can work through this for our marriage and our child. I want to raise our boy together

[farrahchace]

Well I am sorry that is this happening to you and I hope that you can work somthing oout so you can be with your son becuase kids are a great joy in your life. If you really want to get back togetother then try your plan and maybe she will say lets work things out.

I don't know if this is true but from what you are saying it sounds like she doesn't want to be with you but she want you to be there from her. Also i want to point out that your are in the army and that maybe a lot to take in. I know from just having a baby myself that a baby is a lot of work, she might feel overwhelmed.

Maybe you should try to start from the begin again, like going a date to try to reconnect, she might see how thing are differents and want to be with you. She may want to keep her family together.

This sound like something wrong or seens like she is hinding something. Also she might have change some feeling becuase you were away for so long. I know it seens like a lot but if you really want to work things out wth this girl you might just want to start from the begin if she is will becuase she could of changed as well as you.

If she doesn't want to do anything to help to get thought this, maybe you should ask her what she wants to do, and if both of you can't work though this then maybe it is over.

Dr. Haltzman said men and women often can communicate by thier actions rather than words. So when talking to her watch her actions maybe she is trying to tell you somehing in other ways not just by words.

I hope that everything works out and in the end you are happy and get to be with your son.