Adjustment
Posted: Thu Nov 16, 2006 5:22 pm
I am at a loss. My boyfriend, whom I live with, told me that he's been thinking alot about his life. He's 26. He said he has realized that this is what his life will be like from now on. I asked what he meant and he said that he will be with me, here everyday, for the rest of his life and that is how his life will be. It is all "set" now. I was like....okay and that is bad...? He said no, but he said it's just that he has made his choices and here they are. No more freedom, decisions, new women to sleep with, it will just be me and him.
I am loving our relationship. We have been together for 1 year and a half. We don't really argue, we go out, we stay in and watch movies, I make dinner alot, we both work. I am very happy, and happy to make him happy, and the way he said all this stuff totally threw me. I was in the middle of giving him a back rub and had to stop. I went downstairs and quietly cried. He came down and said that he loves me and wants to be with me, but he has never been at a point in his life where he was set in his way. He used to go out and party, bang whoever whenever, just do whatever he wanted. He said he is realizing that is over and he has to be a grown-up now. I asked if he wants to end our relationship. He said not at all. He kept telling me loves me and intends on being with me. He just is thinking about how he is done planning his life now though.
I am so unable to grasp this. He is worried about being almost 30 too! I am 39. I am worried about being 40, hell 30 is young! 40 can be young too. I told him I am not planning on being bored. I want to start to really enjoy life and he is part of that. My kids are grown. I am free to go wherever. (He doesn't want to have any kids). I felt that we were a great match! He is making me feel like we are entering a death sentence. He is so....resigned when he says these things. I am scared. He said he wanted someone, mature that doesn't play games-me, open/honest-me, fun-loving-me, we get along so well. I don't know where this is all coming from. He says I make him happy and all that, but now I am thinking maybe I should walk away.
I am loving our relationship. We have been together for 1 year and a half. We don't really argue, we go out, we stay in and watch movies, I make dinner alot, we both work. I am very happy, and happy to make him happy, and the way he said all this stuff totally threw me. I was in the middle of giving him a back rub and had to stop. I went downstairs and quietly cried. He came down and said that he loves me and wants to be with me, but he has never been at a point in his life where he was set in his way. He used to go out and party, bang whoever whenever, just do whatever he wanted. He said he is realizing that is over and he has to be a grown-up now. I asked if he wants to end our relationship. He said not at all. He kept telling me loves me and intends on being with me. He just is thinking about how he is done planning his life now though.
I am so unable to grasp this. He is worried about being almost 30 too! I am 39. I am worried about being 40, hell 30 is young! 40 can be young too. I told him I am not planning on being bored. I want to start to really enjoy life and he is part of that. My kids are grown. I am free to go wherever. (He doesn't want to have any kids). I felt that we were a great match! He is making me feel like we are entering a death sentence. He is so....resigned when he says these things. I am scared. He said he wanted someone, mature that doesn't play games-me, open/honest-me, fun-loving-me, we get along so well. I don't know where this is all coming from. He says I make him happy and all that, but now I am thinking maybe I should walk away.