Resentment of Wife B'n Blocks My Efforts on Family Chores
Posted: Tue Dec 19, 2006 10:25 am
There is a cycle that I am in the process of identifying and looking for ways to interrpt the cycle.
My wife likes to Make-Wrong, and find fault with me, and make herself feel better by slamming me. I can handle my self-esteem, and avoid snapping back with equal or better insults. I am able to avoid escalating arguments beyond the original antagonism from my wife.
But when it comes time to do more chores for the household, I feel a loss of interest. So my delaying and slacking on household chores creates more opportunities for my wife to find fault with me, and our marriage.
So there is a cycle of my wife complaining, and my feeling less enthusaiastic about family chores, my slacking off, and my wife having more disappointment with the marriage. If I were to do more for the family, this might create a sense of power, which could create a feeling of reliance from my wife, and an increase in my wife's feeling of valuing our marriage.
So increasing enthusiasm in the face of needlessly critical criticism, is my challenge, to generate the love that comes with acts of devotion by a husband to his family
My wife likes to Make-Wrong, and find fault with me, and make herself feel better by slamming me. I can handle my self-esteem, and avoid snapping back with equal or better insults. I am able to avoid escalating arguments beyond the original antagonism from my wife.
But when it comes time to do more chores for the household, I feel a loss of interest. So my delaying and slacking on household chores creates more opportunities for my wife to find fault with me, and our marriage.
So there is a cycle of my wife complaining, and my feeling less enthusaiastic about family chores, my slacking off, and my wife having more disappointment with the marriage. If I were to do more for the family, this might create a sense of power, which could create a feeling of reliance from my wife, and an increase in my wife's feeling of valuing our marriage.
So increasing enthusiasm in the face of needlessly critical criticism, is my challenge, to generate the love that comes with acts of devotion by a husband to his family