Hi, I'm new to this forum but I really need somewhere to reach out. My wife and I have been married a little over a year but lived together for the 7 years prior to our marriage. Our dating relationship was tumultious at best. We had period of extreme peace surround by months of chaos. I was constantly torn between my family, who completely disapproved of her and were very aggressive in their communication of their disapproval, and my ability to give her a marital commitment.
She has had a history of addiction, and the instability that I caused to her life pushed her back into drug addiction. When we got married she began expressing a desire to have children, she has two from a previous marriage, and confessed to me that she had become heavily addicted to Ultram and Xanax to cope with the pain I had caused her. She determined to get clean on her own.
Well during the detox she was HORRIBLE, but it was easy to look past it because of the withdraw. Well she has been clean, to my knowledge, for about 4 months and well now she hates me.
She hates the fact that I don't make enough money, she hates that I don't make her happy(even though she is unsure of what makes her happy).
I have spent the entirety of our marriage and the months leading up to our marriage working to be the best man I can be. I currently work 2 jobs so that she is able to be home for the kids. It isn't that we are poor it's just that I believe it is important to build wealth for the long term. I am in no way a tightwad, she just has had no concern with our finances to understand how big of a mess they were.
She is my whole world and I have no desire to give up. I just need some direction. Oh and she is not your standard, flowers and dinner type. Big is all that matters with her and she is incapable of intimacy on any level. PLEASE HELP!