Strategies for Avoiding Heated Arguments

Strategies for Avoiding Heated Arguments

Postby ThunderHorse » Sat May 18, 2013 1:43 pm

Sometimes a person making a post for advice will acknowledge that there have been arguments in the marriage. It may be a partnership, an engagement or a relationship. The term ARGUMENT has a range of meanings from a dispassionate, logical discussion to name calling, exaggerations, and threats.
Discussing differences, or asking for increased cooperation, can be done without harsh arguing.
Arguing is often trying to win the argument, without the ultimate concern for the other person’s feelings. Arguing often includes sarcasm, derisive comments, belittling, shading the truth, raising of the voice, yelling, threatening or screaming.

Many people do not consider arguing to be verbal abuse. But many tactics in winning an argument involve elements of verbal abuse. You can win the battle and lose the war. If a partner uses derisive concepts to win an argument in a love relationship, the Love in the relationship may be diminished. People in Love relationships are looking for Respect and Adoration. Winning too may arguments, may harm the marriage. Finding compromises to issues of a potential argument, demonstrates Love, as well as avoids the argument.

Many people in Love relationships have been in arguments. The purpose of this thread is encourage the improving of relationships, by avoiding the adverse effects of arguments. There are many suggestions in The Secrets of Happily Married Men, of how to avoid arguments.

Arguments sometimes occur by surprise. So the challenge changes from avoiding an argument, to ending or suspending an argument. Sometimes, a partner will agree to discuss the matter at another time.

The strategy of a husband listening to his woman, is discussed in two chapters in the Men’s secrets book. So a Husband can avoid surprise arguments by listening to his wife more. Also, practicing listening strategies give practice in defusing situations by encouraging your wife to vent. See the thread Listening Strategies for Men under Communication.

Most of us have seen our parents argue, and the memory of our parents arguments sometimes make an impression on us, as an example of appropriate behavior. So it may be important to stop ourselves, if we find ourselves using negative strategies that we observed in our parents.
Posts: 636
Joined: Mon Jul 31, 2006 6:10 pm

Return to Communication

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 6 guests