by rjblack9 » Sun Sep 20, 2009 11:56 am
Let's give better insight: I had been focused on work and not on home life for about a year now, since my position at work changed. I dedicated all my effort to work, (not all my time) so when I get home I am tired and less than energetic. After about a year of this, and my wife occasionally asking me to see a medical person because to her, I was always down, unhappy, etc. (When it was mainly me being exhausted from work)
Now mind you when I was at home, I always wanted to please my wife, so if she requested something, I would do it, huffin' & puffin' but I did it (I know that's not the best way).
So now I am seeing a therapist and finding out its not all me, yes I really didn't have any hobbies outside of work but I am making efforts and adjusting my work and home life and making strides to even out my energy towards them.
So its been two months and my wife is telling me, so loves me but is not in love with me... and she doesn't know how to get it back.
Since my therapy sessions I have learned that I forgot how to take my wife on dates, we go out to dinner atleast once a week, BUT we take our child. So a few times since then, I have coordinated everything from reservations to babysitter and she enjoyed those dates, but still won't talk to me about our relationship to give me insight to what she wants. She stays upstairs doing her homework or watching TV, she doesn't come downstairs and she stays up later than I do. I end up getting up with our child every weekend and 2x during the week. Granted my job is a little flexible and she works once a week but is going to school. I have been bending over backwards to try and make things better but she is not doing anything to help me. No direction on her part