by ThunderHorse » Wed Aug 18, 2010 5:34 am
Are there other ways in which you feel manipulated?
If you were to write him a letter, how would the letter sound?
"Your avoiding me makes me feel unappreciated. Your mother and I are now a family, and I have agreed to use family money to support your college education, and expenses. I have always tried to be respectful to you, personally. I feel that you are being disrespectful to me, by deliberately avoiding all contact wtih me."
A bigger issue may be his getting a job, and staying sober. Getting a DUI, or extended periods of unemployment could be costly.
Maybe list out all the issues, and see what issue you want to work on first. Maybe write him a letter and offer to sit down to discuss his job application processes, if he has not found a job in a couple of weeks. Maybe use his aversion to you, as a motivator.
Maybe offering to sit down with him for Lunch might be a way to establish a rapport, so that you are not conflicting with the supportive relationship he feels from his mother.
I am not sure you have the top issue, forefront in your mind.
I agree his avoiding you is less than ideal, but maybe work on the bigger issues first, and the issue of avoidance may lessen.
//